Be Guided

My Body Told Me How Well I Am Doing

I began having massages earlier this year at the suggestion of several friends. Each time I went, it helped for a little while, though the massage itself was never what I would describe as relaxing. How could it be, when I was so tense all the time? Charlotte, my massage therapist, spent most of the time loosening all the knots I accumulated.

Recently, I went on a transatlantic cruise by myself. Although that scared many I told, for me it would be a welcome break from the otherwise hamster-wheel life I chose. Work was consuming much of my life, and, between business trips, I was settling into a new home. Day to day affairs were all on me as I am single and unattached. This life was all my choice, but never did I imagine it would take the toll it had on me physically.

While away, I had several spa treatments. After one in particular that included a detox, I felt different. Little did I know that this may have been the catalyst I didn’t know I needed. Something was released from my body, something that was no longer serving me. I can’t even identify or describe it other than I know it no longer resides in me. By the time I arrived home, it felt like I had smoked a joint. I don’t know if I have ever felt that relaxed for an extended period. When the feeling finally wore off, it was replaced by an inner calm that is now guiding almost everything I approach. Although I consider myself to be on a spiritual journey, I think back on the stress that I approached everything I encountered with. It was as if my body has a role in guiding my reactions.

I recently went for a massage with Charlotte. Soon after she started, I noticed something… there was no pain. I was actually enjoying it. I even dozed off at some point as relaxation set in.

After I got dressed, Charlotte told me that if she was blindfolded she never would have believed it was me she was massaging. When I told her what happened, she understood. I don’t know if it was the spa treatments, being in the middle of the ocean, the relaxation of traveling alone, or that my spirit was simply ready to release whatever I was holding onto. It doesn’t really matter. I’ve been told I am carrying myself differently, and I feel lighter.

My body spoke, and I listened. It doesn’t matter what changed or how but only that it did.

3 thoughts on “My Body Told Me How Well I Am Doing

Comments are closed.

  • Dear Mom, I was drawn to write you for the first time in ages, and I’m not sure why.  Perhaps it is because of Mother’s Day, but I guess it doesn’t really matter.  I can’t believe you have been gone 36 years.  You died when I was 26, so you’ve
    Grateful for going to my home group and seeing people I love. Grateful for meeting a lady at the meeting with 32 years in recovery and exchanging numbers. Grateful for being able to go grocery shopping. Grateful for being able to fall asleep in the midst of all the fireworks.
    Dear Grant, It is a week, almost to the minute, since I texted you to find out if you were joining the conference call we had scheduled with a vendor.  Knowing you as I do, there had to be a good reason you weren’t on time.  I let the others
    My clean date is March 3, 1995.  How I mark that day has changed a lot over the years.   In the beginning, I did it the way it was suggested back then — seven meetings in seven days. I’d pick up a chip, share about how I stayed clean